Back From Hell (Marine For You Book 2) (Contemporary Military Veteran Romance) Read Free Page B

who have tried to help you?”
    “Prying.” He tugged the blankets up farther, trying to ease his discomfort. “I don’t need help.”
    “Liar.”
    “That’s not a question,” he pointed out.
    “You haven’t answered my question honestly, so it still stands.” She uncrossed her legs and leaned closer. “You’ve been through a lot. There’s so much pain in your eyes but you refuse to talk to anyone. Why?”
    “What I’ve seen isn’t any worse than what others have witnessed or lived through. All they want to do is give me drugs. I don’t want drugs that will make me forget, cloud my judgement, or act like a zombie. I’m learning to live with my ghosts.”
    “You don’t want prescription drugs; instead you’d prefer whiskey. Alcohol will only help you forget for a little while. You’ll need to talk about it to move forward.”
    “What do you know about it?”
    “More than you think.” She stood and moved away from the bed. “My father…his Army service changed him. Not just physically with his burns, but also mentally. He came home to us different. At first, he chose alcohol as a way to keep the memories at bay, but as the weeks passed he had to drink more and more to do the job. Eventually, it wasn’t enough and he took other means to end the horrible thoughts…permanently.”
    “I’m sorry for your loss, but things are different for me.”
    “Isn’t that what everyone thinks?”
    She kept her back to him and, had it been months ago, before he’d ended up as a cripple, he’d have gone to her. Comforted her. Instead, he lay in that bed, useless, and it confirmed once again that he’d never be good enough. Stop taking up space and resources that could help someone else. You’re not worth it any longer.
    “I lost my father because no one helped him. Maybe he was like you and wouldn’t let anyone in but Mom tried to shelter me from his problems . The only time I had any quality time with Dad was when she was on a vet call and we were on the ranch together, taking care of the horses. We bonded over that but I could tell something was wrong. It wasn’t until my senior year in high school that I found his journals.”
    “Journals.” It might have been sexist but he had always thought that was more of a woman thing.
    “Yeah.” She turned to glance at him. “Don’t sound so surprised; a lot of men keep journals. It’s also not uncommon for those in counseling to do it. Dad never went to see a counselor so I’m not sure why he started writing one. Maybe it was because he did it with the horses. He kept a journal of their lives for the owners. Accomplishments, training, everything. He might have thought getting it down on paper would help. I’m not sure, but it left me with an insight about him that I never had before.”
    “So that’s why you’re here? You couldn’t save your father, so now I’m what? A surrogate?”
    She spun around on her heels to face him, her face alight with anger as she glared at him. “How dare you?”
    “Hit a sore spot?” The pain in her eyes almost stopped him—she didn’t deserve him lashing out at her—but the need to keep her off him proved too overpowering. “Well, I don’t like being a replacement for someone you couldn’t save. I’ve said it a thousand times before and I’ll say it again: I’m fine. I don’t need anyone’s help, pity, or anything else.”
    “Fine. I know there’s plenty of others here who would love the company.” She nearly ran to the door, but paused before she passed through. “I wish you all the best. Don’t let the people that care about you down because you don’t like me. You can get through this.” With that, she was gone.
    Don’t let people down…if only I hadn’t already. If only I hadn’t changed places with you, Weber, you’d still be alive. Crippled but alive to be with your wife and child.
----
    S taci spent the next two hours visiting with those who actually wanted her company. Yet, even as she