Anita Blake 22.6 - Shutdown Read Free Page B

excessive public display of affection for Anita and Micah.”
    Ellen turned and looked up at him, eyes wide. “You’re teasing me.”
    Richard shook his head and looked down at her at the same time, so that his hair fell forward and hid most of his face from me.
    Ellen stared up at him for a few seconds and then turned back to us with an almost horrified look on her face. I had no idea what we’d done to earn that look.
    Micah sat up a little straighter, doing more of a standard arm across the shoulders half-hug with the other hand just holding mine on the table top. I sat up straighter, too, though part of me wanted to do something even more up close and personal just so Ellen would have a real reason for looking shocked, but I wasn’t a child, and this was Richard’s problem, not mine. As one of our newer vampires, who was originally Polish, would say, “Nie Moj Cyrk, Nie Moje Malpy - Not my circus, not my monkeys.”
    Of course, the fact that he was still my lover, and still with Jean-Claude, and Asher, meant that in a way he was still a part of our circus and he, at least was still our monkey, but Ellen wasn’t. Unfortunately, one thing I’d learned about being poly is that just because you’re not having sex with someone doesn’t mean they can’t screw it all up; everyone’s lover can affect the emotional side of things and Ellen had all the ear marks of being a pain in everyone’s emotional poly ass.
    I decided to go for truth. I didn’t know what else to do; besides our lives were working and that was too important to fuck with by not being honest.
    “What did we do just now that bothered you, Ellen?” I asked.
    Micah hugged me a little harder, as if in warning.
    I glanced at him. “We can’t avoid upsetting her if we don’t know what upset her in the first place.” I looked at Ellen, and tried to look helpful, questioning, waiting.
    She glanced at Richard.
    “Anita has a point, if we don’t know what makes you anxious we can’t avoid it.”
    She looked from one to the other of us. “I . . . I . . . it was just so . . . intimate. Holding hands, kissing, hugging, sitting close, and rubbing your faces against each other’s necks and faces. The way your hand keeps disappearing underneath the table and I can see your hand moving, Anita.”
    “I’m petting his thigh, Ellen, that’s all. My hand may be close to his groin, but I would never do that sitting in public and especially not in a situation where I’m trying to help convince you that this is all somehow normal and okay. That would be rude and stupid. I’m trying not to be the first, and I’m not the second if I can avoid it.”
    She blushed. “I’m sorry . . . I’m so sorry.” She stood up.
    Richard caught her hand. “Ellen, please.”
    “No, Richard, she’s deliberately trying to make me feel stupid and rude, and just . . . I can’t do this.”
    “For the love of God, Ellen, if you don’t tell us what upset you we can’t fix it,” I said.
    She shook her head. “I thought I could do this, Richard, I really did. I thought meeting Anita and seeing her with someone else she loved would make me feel more secure about it all, but it doesn’t. It just doesn’t help at all.”
    “Ellen, please sit back down and talk to us,” Richard said. He still had her hand in his.
    She pulled on his hand for a moment and then, as she stared down at him, her face softened. Looking at how yummy he was always made it hard for me to be mad at him, too, or had once. Being in love with someone gives them a lot of extra clout. She finally let him ease her back into her chair.
    She looked at us; her eyes were shiny with unshed tears, but her voice was calm when it came. “I thought I could do this, but I don’t think I can. I love you, and you are everything I want, all I want, Richard. I was willing to believe that you needed rougher things in the bedroom than I was comfortable with, so I thought I could accept you needed someone for that and