though, she said, “Plus I got tired of fighting
with him, tired of feeling like I was beneath him.”
“And by that, you mean what?”
The fight she had with Carter at the theater
two months ago was still fresh on her mind like it just happened
yesterday. He was furious, mad at her because she’d insinuated he
was ashamed of her and didn’t want to be seen with her in public.
She knew it was a lie, but she was so jealous and hurt at the time,
she didn’t care. He was the one making advances towards her –
hugging and kissing on her like she was the only woman for him,
like she stood a chance to be with a man of his caliber when the
reality was, he was seeing some stuck-up chick named Genevieve.
Shayla looked up at Jacqueline and said,
“Carter has everything and not afraid to show it…not afraid to
flaunt his success and meanwhile, I have nothing to show for
myself…not saying that’s his fault, but I have feelings and I don’t
want to be around someone who constantly looks down upon me.”
Jacqueline drew in a deep breath. “Carter
doesn’t look down on you, Shayla.”
Now you’re coming to his defense, Shayla thought, but Jacqueline was right. If Carter looked down on
her, he wouldn’t have saved her life while she lay homeless on the
street back in February. “He’s from a different world than I
am.”
“Okay, that’s true. You two are from
different worlds but that doesn’t mean he looks down on you.”
“Well, I don’t fit into his lifestyle,”
Shayla rattled off. “We don’t run in the same circles, and a man
like him can’t very well be with a woman who’s not like him.”
“Sounds to me like those are your feelings,
not his.”
Shayla used a straw to play with the ice in
her glass of water. Those were her feelings, because the
truth of the matter was, she didn’t really know how Carter felt
about her. She was confused. The man had taken her in, gave her
anything she wanted, spent time with her, held her some nights when
she couldn’t sleep…he did everything to cater to her. And Shayla
could only conclude that he didn’t want to be with her because she
wasn’t good enough for him. What else could it have been? Why would
he take care of her, only to turn around and kick her out of his
house after a few months?
“If anything, I think he’s afraid of you,
Shayla.” Jacqueline commented.
Shayla frowned and grunted. Carter wasn’t
afraid of anything. He was very smart and equally strong –
strong-willed and strong-minded. Shaking her head, she said,
“Carter’s not afraid of me.”
“Let me be more specific. He’s afraid of
falling in love with you,” Jacqueline said with confidence because
she knew that was true, having spoken with Carter directly after
Shayla had moved out.
Shayla giggled uncomfortably and glanced out
the window, though she really felt sad enough to cry. “Nah…that’s
not it, Jackie. Carter can have any woman he wants. Why would he
even entertain the thought of falling in love with me? Trust me, it
ain’t that.”
Jacqueline sighed. Of course it was that.
But his love soon turned to anger, especially after she moved out
and didn’t bother to contact him. Now, she was leaving the state?
“Honey, all I know is when I first met you in the flower shop, I
thought you and Carter were a couple. You were so happy and
vibrant. He was happy, too and now you’re both miserable.”
I’m miserable. He’s not. “Jackie, I’m
fine and Carter is a lot of things, but I can guarantee you,
miserable isn’t one of them. I’m sure he has enough women to keep
himself entertained.”
“Oh no, honey. Not my Carter.”
Shayla laughed. She could picture Genevieve
in her mind, wearing that red lipstick and tight skirt. “You’ve
been out of his life for the last, I-don’t-know-how-many years, so
you wouldn’t know. He actually told me he wasn’t the one-woman type
which is really odd considering he’s such a gentleman.”
“I’m sorry, but Carter