A Hidden Life Read Free Page B

Copyright in Grandad’s books … they’d been out of print for decades. They were worthless. Constance had disinherited her, and Lou could almost feel her grandmother’s malevolent presence in the room.
I’ve won,
she’d be saying, from that special hell reserved for the unkind, the jealous, the unforgiving, the endlessly resentful.
I’ve punished you for years of not loving me. I’ve given everything to Ellie’s children. She was closer to me than your father, or you, or anyone related to me by blood. Serves you right.
    When the solicitor left the room, after what seemed like a very long time, everyone started talking at once.
    â€˜I’ll fight it, Lou,’ her father said. ‘She must have gone mad. I’m sure that …’
    â€˜Oh, my poor child!’ That was Ellie.
    â€˜I don’t know what to say …’ Nessa sounded tearful.
    Lou heard her mother’s voice cutting through the babble.
    â€˜What’s the matter with all of you? Don’t you understand what’s happened here? I don’t believe it … I simply cannot credit it … It’s monstrous. The copyright to books that have been out of print for years and that no one wanted to read when they were in print … can you imagine a more worthless thing? It’s deliberate. She’s thought about this carefully. She’s punishing my daughter from beyond the grave. It’s a wicked thing to do! Quite wicked!’
    And Lou watched as her mother, who almost never spoke her mind, who was terrified of making an exhibition of herself, burst into noisy tears and sank on to the sofa.
    â€˜Don’t cry, Mum!’ Lou ran to her side and put an arm around her shoulders. ‘It doesn’t matter.’
    â€˜But it does! It does matter. She’s putting the knife in from beyond the grave … It’s hateful and unkind. She’s saying it loud and clear, Lou … can’t you hear?
You loved him while he was alive, didn’t you? Well, here are his books and you’re welcome to them. No one else wants them.’
    â€˜Never mind, Mum. Honestly.’ Lou stared at them, her family, all talking, all tut-tutting and shaking their heads. Suddenly, she had a longing to be somewhere else. To be with Poppy in the grotty flat. Anywhere but here, in Milthorpe House.
    â€˜I’m going home now, I think,’ she told her mother. ‘I’ll see you soon.’
    â€˜Let me drive you to the station, darling.’ Phyl wiped her eyes, and sat up straighter. She stood up and gave Lou her hand. For the first time that day, Lou felt as though she wanted to lie down and cry for ever. She nodded, unable to say a word.
    *
    â€˜I thought you might need cheering up, that’s all,’ said Ellie, sitting down at the kitchen table. ‘You stormed out of the drawing room looking like thunder. Anyone could see you were about to explode or something.’
    Nessa went on washing up, taking care to rinse every single plate and cup and teaspoon in hot water. It never failed to amaze her how quickly the dishes mounted up whenever more than two people gottogether. Who’d used all this stuff? And when? She didn’t bother to turn round to face her mother.
    â€˜I don’t need cheering up. It’s too late for anger.’
    â€˜Doesn’t stop you from feeling like hell, though, does it?’
    Nessa decided that how she felt was none of her mother’s business. She’d forfeited the right to be involved when she’d handed over responsibility for her children to a husband she’d tired of almost before the honeymoon was over, and then later to his boring new wife. Nessa made an effort not to think along these particular lines now. It wasn’t an appropriate time to go into every single grudge she held against Ellie. There were many of them and just at this moment Nessa was too furious with Constance to be