A Fallen Woman Read Free Page A

for a moment before speaking
again, the words coming out in a rush. ‘So will it be awkward, him
being there?’
    It took a
moment for Rachel to take her sister’s meaning, another to consider
her response. Mama must have told her that Worsley had made an
offer for her and that she had turned him down. The week before
disaster had struck was still a bit of a muddle in her head –
shock, no doubt mixed with grief – but she knew the earl’s offer
had come only a few days before she had agreed to run away with
Dorian Salinger. She frowned, thinking back to her uncomfortable
interview with Worsley and images flashed through her head. His
tall figure striding towards her as she sat in the conservatory,
expression eager. Reaching for her hand and a rush of words. No
doubt it had all been dreadfully awkward. Even so, she did not
think that she could be held responsible for an absence that had
gone on for over three years. ‘People probably blamed me when he
left’ she said slowly. ‘And I daresay that I could have managed the
whole thing better. I was… surprised when he asked me to marry him.
Although,’ she added with a sigh, ‘I suppose I shouldn’t have been.
All the signs were there, were they not? I was just too preoccupied
to see them for what they were.’
    This time it was Charlotte who reached out to squeeze her sister’s
hand. ‘I do believe you were moonstruck for those few months during
that summer. You were certainly not the same Rachel I have always
known. You seemed… absent, somehow. As if you were constantly
thinking of something else.’
    ‘I was absent and a fool into the bargain,’ Rachel returned wryly. ‘A green,
unthinking fool caught up in... well, I suppose it was the same
thing poor Worsley was caught up in. I believed myself in love.’ At
her sister’s request some years earlier, Rachel had tried to
explain what had happened to her when she had fallen under the
spell of Dorian Salinger. Charlotte had been old enough to
understand by then and Rachel could not see the purpose of
withholding the events of the past. It would serve as a cautionary
tale, if nothing else. Even after time had passed she still
struggled to understand what had prompted her to act in such a way.
In hindsight, her behavior had been quite mad.
    ‘But it
was not love that you felt for Mr. Salinger… was it?’ Charlotte
asked softly. It was the one question she had not asked her sister
when they had discussed Rachel’s time in London. Now that she had
fallen in love herself, she found it hard to reconcile her own
feelings with what Rachel had described.
    ‘Dear me, no. I suppose I realized that quite quickly after
I had returned to Thorncroft. It made my own actions even harder to
bear.’ Rachel grimaced. ‘What I felt for Dorian Salinger was folly,
pure and simple. It was an… uncomfortable time but it passed. What
you and Adam feel for each other is entirely different. I am quite
sure it will not pass. Indeed, it will grow stronger and deeper over the
years. I could not wish for anything more for you.’
    ‘ But what about you?’ Charlotte asked softly. ‘You deserve such
happiness just as much as I do.’
    Rachel shook her head. ‘I gave away any chance of that
eventuality when I ran away with an opportunistic adventurer,’ she
said firmly. ‘Do not feel sorry for me, Charlotte. You were all so good to me
after the event. You forgave me unconditionally. I am still
surprised that Mama and Papa did not pack me off to a
nunnery.’
    ‘Rachel!’
Charlotte was shocked. ‘As if they would have ever done such a
thing. They love you dearly.’
    ‘I am
sure there are many parents who love their children who would not
have tolerated such shocking behavior. I could have cost you your
future, you and Liza and whatever worthy endeavours my brothers
might aspire to. I know I upset poor George and James dreadfully.
Or rather, I upset James’ wife,’ she added with a slight wince at
the thought of James’