69 Things to Do With a Dead Princess Read Free Page B

attention to the dummy’s shaft. It wasn’t hard to get him to come in my mouth. My goal achieved, I French-kissed Alan’s double. This gave me ample opportunity to spit the huge wad of spunk I’d extracted from Dudley into his mouth. I kept him pinned down until he’d swallowed it.
    After that we just lay together on the beach for a very long time. We didn’t think of taking a shower before we went to bed, we just wanted to collapse. We had sand all over us and after a bit more shagging, the bed was really gritty. We fucked some more in the tangled sheets when we woke. Then we headed for Saffron Walden. After parking the car we made our way into Bridge End Gardens. There was bird shit all over the benches in the park. Having squeezed through a piece of broken fence, we entered the Bridge End hedge maze from the east side. It took a lot of twisting and turning before we found our way to the centre. The statues and other monuments that originally decorated the maze had been removed. We made love at the goal and at this point I woke.

TWO
    I AWOKE suddenly from the dark pool of sleep, Alan was already stirring, slipping out from between my floral duvet and a white sheet. It took me a while to remember who Alan was. I could hear him pissing into the toilet as I put the events of the previous day into place. When Alan re-entered my bedsit I laughed because he hadn’t dressed and I knew that would have given the nymphomaniac who lived opposite me quite a thrill if she’d run into him on the stairs. Then I saw Hannah, my sex-mad neighbour, following Alan through the door. Hannah liked group sex and when she brought a bloke home who I found attractive it wasn’t unknown for me to join in.
    Alan stood above me grinning. Hannah embraced him from behind. Her hands snaked around his torso and she stroked his cock into an erection, then held it tightly. Hannah put the index finger of her free hand into her mouth and proceeded to massage saliva into Alan’s left nipple. He squirmed with pleasure. I sat up and took Alan’s cock in my mouth. Hannah sank to her knees and began to rim him. As I lubricated the length, I could feel myself getting all wet. I got onto my knees and turned around, so that Alan could enter me from behind, standing up. Hannah removed her skirt and panties, then climbed onto the bed. She pushed my head down against the mattress and clambered onto my back, lying with her back against my back and her legs swung over Alan’s shoulders.
    I couldn’t see anything, my eyes were closed but I knew from the sounds and movement of our bodies that Alan was licking Hannah out as he gave me a shafting. I came as Alan shot his load into my hole and from the way she screamed, I knew an orgasm had washed through Hannah’s body too. There was a tangle of limbs and Hannah struggled up. Told us she had to rush or she’d be late for work. Alan crawled into bed beside me and we slept for the best part of two hours. We made love when we woke up. The missionary position, nothing exotic. Eventually we dressed. I was out of milk so we went to Carmine’s on Union Terrace for an early lunch. Over pasta and cappuccinos we discussed literature.
    Alan commented on my collection of Kathy Acker’s work – Great Expectation , Blood and Guts in High School , Don Quixote , Literal Madness , Empire of the Senseless , Portrait of an Eye , In Memoriam to Identity , My Mother: Demonology , Hannibal Lecter My Father , Bodies of Work , Eurydice in the Underworld and Pussy, King of the Pirates . Alan admired Kathy Acker but said he could never read through to the end of her books. He was surprised when I told him I just read passages at random, it made no sense to read Kathy Acker from beginning to end. At some point Alan told me that in her essays Acker fell behind the premises from which she started out in her fiction. I told Alan he didn’t know how to read. Imagine starting on page one with a book and then proceeding through to the